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The Unbridled Joy of Special Needs Parenting
A Special Needs Parent’s User’s Manual for the Heart This is the guide I wish I had found 20+ years ago when I discovered I was destined to be the parent of a Special Needs child. My son has been diagnosed with moderate to severe autism. The first half of this post is directly copied…
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Sadness is the Great Liberator
Sadness Is the Great Liberator The day I finally sat down and wept for my son—for the life I thought he would have, for the dreams I had carried—was the day my healing truly began. It wasn’t pretty. There were no inspirational music swells in the background, no moment of transcendent understanding. Just me, alone,…
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Denial is Willful Ignorance
Denial Is Willful Ignorance I want to talk to you about something difficult but necessary: denial. I’ve been there myself, and I know how tempting it can be to hide from painful truths. Denial isn’t just simple ignorance—it’s a chosen ignorance, a deliberate turning away from what’s right in front of us because the reality…
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Getting Angry Won’t Make Your Child Less Autistic
The Perils of Anger The morning I fully realized my son wasn’t going to catch up with his peers, I slammed my coffee mug down so hard that it cracked. My wife flinched. I didn’t apologize. I was too busy being furious at the world, at our circumstances, at her, at myself—though I wasn’t ready…
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Grieving the Loss of What You Never Had
Grieving the Loss of What You Never Had The day I finally accepted my son’s diagnosis, I sat and wept. Not just a few quiet tears, but deep, body-shaking sobs that seemed to come from somewhere ancient inside me. I wasn’t just crying for my son—I was mourning the death of a dream. When you…
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Shattering the Dreams of a Perfect Child
My Common Journey I’ve known my autistic son was special for two decades now. Through those years, I’ve also come to know many families with special needs children, and I’ve noticed so many commonalities in our experiences. It’s like we’re all walking different paths through the same forest, encountering the same landmarks, just at different…
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Your Autistic Child is Not Broken
Do you have a broken child? Is your world crashing down around you? I remember that feeling—the moment when everything you thought your life would be suddenly shatters into pieces. Your dreams of the perfect family now lie in tatters. That hopelessness and despair can feel overwhelming, can’t it? When you first realize your perfect…
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Writing 201: How to Restart after a Long Break
Engaging the writer’s mind and hearing the Muse’s voice. A few months ago, I took what I thought was going to be a small break, and it turned into a long one. A spiritual practice is something each of us must live, not in theory, but actually in practice. Sometimes, that practice involves giving to…
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Balancing Act: Striking the Right Harmony Between Worldly Ambitions and Spiritual Needs
Each person must find their own balance point between pursing worldly goals and finding inner peace. My apologies for the slow pace of new posts lately. I haven’t lost my enthusiasm, nor have I run out of material. Over the last three weeks, my life circumstances made it necessary to focus on worldly matters. I…
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Tibetan Buddhist Lamrim: Taking (aka Tonglen)
Tonglen meditation involves visualizing the suffering of others as dark smoke absorbed into the heart, where it is purified and transformed into light, then radiated outward. In Buddhist psychology, there are three fundamental reactions to the experience of any phenomenon. If one were to examine their day to day experiences of objects, they would find…